End of Life

Watching Mum die from a terminal illness was the most emotionally stressful situation I’ve ever been through. Everything that happened from 5th November 2017 (the day it had been discovered that Mum’s cancer had spread and was incurable), was so difficult that it is beyond comprehension. Mum was in a hospice for a few weeks duringContinue reading “End of Life”

Losing my Grandma

My lovely Nan, Patricia Dowell, died in April 2019. She had just turned 80 years old, and both her physical and mental health had started to decline since my Mum died little over a year earlier. Nan was always there, no matter what we needed. She was a great cook, seamstress, a fierce friend andContinue reading “Losing my Grandma”

What have you learnt from the loss of a loved one?

A couple of weeks ago, Chelsie from Bereavedat22 tagged me in a post headed with the above question. It got me thinking about what I have learnt, and how I can grow and share to support others. I have focused on three main things that I’ve learnt along my grief journey so far. You can read partContinue reading “What have you learnt from the loss of a loved one?”

What have you learnt from the loss of a loved one?

Number 2 – Realisations in grief The second thing I’ve learnt since losing my loved ones is the realisation that not everything about them was good. People are people, they have good traits and bad traits, and dead people aren’t an exception to that rule. The things I would sacrifice to experience one more hugContinue reading “What have you learnt from the loss of a loved one?”

Five Things I’ve Learnt so far – Part 3

Lesson number three – It’s not like the movies. By that, I mean that the way that death and dying is depicted in the media, TV and films is far from reality (from what I’ve seen, anyway). A bit of background on my Mum’s diagnosis – she had breast cancer, six rounds of chemo andContinue reading “Five Things I’ve Learnt so far – Part 3”

Togetherness

I’ve seen so many inspirational and intuitive posts recently. People have been posting about being “together” in this pandemic, as much as people are isolated, there’s a sense of togetherness and community. People are doing things for one another, sharing appreciation for NHS and emergency service workers, and most people who can stay at homeContinue reading “Togetherness”

The Weight of it All

Something I want to address is the weight that is placed on you through seeing someone you love die. For me it was a constant state of ambivalence throughout treatment, illness, and death. When my Mum was diagnosed with cancer, I didn’t cry. I can’t remember feeling anything at all at the moment she toldContinue reading “The Weight of it All”

Being Motherless

Sorry I’ve been less active the past few days, I’ve had job interviews, visited family, and it’s been Sam’s birthday too! I wanted to write something about being and feeling motherless, especially with Mothers’ Day on the horizon. Mothers’ Day was just eight days after my Mum passed away and the day after Sam’s birthdayContinue reading “Being Motherless”

Mum’s Funeral Service

This post is the eulogy that was written by my Nan for Mum’s funeral, delivered by celebrant Ellie Lomas. “On behalf of the family, I would like to welcome you to this special ceremony as we celebrate the life of a wonderful lady, Sue Szumowski. Any kind donations, in memory of Sue, will benefit CancerContinue reading “Mum’s Funeral Service”

Arranging Mum’s Funeral

Maybe about a week before Mum died, I messaged my friend Sophie whose Mum works as a funeral director. I asked Sophie if I could come round hers at some point and chat to her Mum about what to expect when planning a funeral, the “plans”, the average costs etc. At this point, Sophie andContinue reading “Arranging Mum’s Funeral”